


Slowly Fade Away

by NiniAtTheYAC



Category: High School Musical: The Musical: The Series (TV)
Genre: Deleted Scenes, F/M, No but like REALLY sad, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-02
Updated: 2020-03-02
Packaged: 2021-02-27 21:47:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22982740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NiniAtTheYAC/pseuds/NiniAtTheYAC
Summary: A deleted scene from my fic "My Heart is Wherever You Are" that takes place between chapters 13 and 14.I really like this scene (even though it hurts me) but I felt like the actual story just didn't need this in it.
Relationships: Ricky Bowen & Nini Salazar-Roberts, Ricky Bowen/Nini Salazar-Roberts
Comments: 6
Kudos: 42





	Slowly Fade Away

**Author's Note:**

> Since I'm the one writing this story my perception of it might be a bit off, but I don't think this has any real spoilers for the next chapter of the fic, but maybe wait till after you read that tomorrow before reading it. This might not be as well edited as my usual work cause I didn't think it was going anywhere, and honestly, it's sad and I don't really want to read it again. so bear with me. Also, this scene exists because of the songs "Left behind" from Spring Awakening and "You Said You'd Grow Old With Me" by Michael Schulte.

It was a restless sleep, that was for sure. There was that feeling that people often talked about, where you were trying to sleep and then all the sudden the sensation of falling and hitting the ground suddenly jolted you out of sleep. Yeah, that’s how Nini felt trying to fall asleep. Even with Ricky right beside her, she couldn’t shake the constant worry that he could slip away. 

What if she fell asleep and he wasn’t there when she woke up? 

She couldn’t say when, but eventually, she did sleep and eventually that sleep was interrupted by Ricky’s voice. “Nini,” he sounded strained and a little bit panicked. “Nini, can we talk for a minute?” 

She woke with a start and immediately fumbled to sit up and grip his hand tighter. Her eyes found his in the dimly lit room. Her heart ached looking at him, there was pain written all over his face. “Ricky, what’s wrong?” she asked, beginning to tremble slightly. 

“I don’t feel right. Something’s not right,” he said. The look in his eye was defeated and desperate. 

“Hey,” she said. “It’s okay, love. We can call in the nurse.” She stood up to reach past him for the call button, but his hand caught her arm before she could reach it. 

“Nins, don’t. Please.” She looked at him, more alarmed than ever. 

“Ricky, _what_ is going on? I’m just trying to help you,” Nini said. Although he was weak his grip on her arm was surprisingly strong. He pulled her towards him, to cradle her against his chest. “Be careful,” she reminded him. “Your incisions-”

“There’s nothing to be done.” Ricky cut her off. _Oh_. The gravity of his words hit her then. She turned to look at him, trying to hold him, and crawl up onto the bed with him, all at once. “No,” she said. Tears were already clouding her eyes, “Ricky, you can’t. You promised! You said you’d do anything for me. You can’t- you have to-” Nini couldn’t finish a sentence. She couldn’t finish a thought. She could hardly breathe. 

“I’m so sorry, Nini.” To his credit, Ricky really did sound sorry, even as he spoke through his gasps for breath. “Hey- remember- our first- kiss?” He asked. Nini let out a tearful sob. 

“Of course I do. The summer before Freshman year, we both said we wanted to practice just once before high school started, because then we would do it with someone for real, and we didn’t want to be complete amateurs.” Despite her heart crumbling to pieces, Nini smiled at Ricky. His eyes looked unfocused, but they still fought to meet hers. 

“I never- told you- I kissed you- because I heard- other guys- talking about- asking you out,” he paused for a moment, wheezing. “I wanted our- first kiss to- be each other.” Nini surged forward to kiss him desperately, he kissed her back, and for a moment she could almost imagine that things were going to be okay. 

“You know, I never could look at you the same way after that day. I already had a crush on you before then, but I think that was the day I fell in love with you,” she told him through her sobs. 

His face lit up for a moment, “Then, I guess- I did one thing- right,” he said.

“You’ve done a lot right, Ricky. You’ve made mistakes, but you always tried to do what was right by me, and I know that.” She said, hoping against hope for just a little bit more time. She rested her forehead against his, held him as tight as she could without hurting him, and tried to memorize every living feature on his face. 

As his eyes fluttered shut, he said “I loved- you then. And- I love you- now.” He seemed to be fading faster now. Nini blindly reached down to find his hand, she twined her pinky around his one more time. She felt his curl against hers, a small smile flitted across his face. “I will love you forever, Ricky,” she said through her tears. 

The monitors around them began to scream, at the same moment that Nini screamed. The doctors rushed in, at the same moment that all of the air rushed out of Nini’s lungs, and all of the life rushed out of Ricky. This was an unspeakable pain-

\---

A pair of hands shook her, and Nini woke with a strangled cry. “Miss, it’s okay! It’s okay, you were just dreaming.” Nini looked around frantically. The woman in front of her was a stranger, but she was clearly Ricky’s night nurse. And Ricky was beside her, sound asleep, but she could see his chest very much still rising and falling. “Here,” the nurse said, holding out a tissue. 

Nini paused for a moment, still somewhat in shock, before she realized why she was being offered a tissue. She had a river of tears streaming down her face. “Thank you,” Nini said, taking it from her and wiping her face. The nurse gave her a sympathetic look. 

“Not a problem,” she said. “Are you alright? Do you want to talk for a minute?” Nini was about to refuse her, say that she was fine, this woman was a stranger after all. But she had never felt less fine in her life. 

After a quick debate with herself, she finally said, “I’m Ricky’s girlfriend, Nini.” 

The nurse smiled kindly, “Nice to meet you, Nini. I’m Meg.” 

“He, in my dream, I thought he died,” she said looking back over at Ricky who was still soundly asleep. 

“I figured as much,” Meg said. “Have you two been dating long?” She asked. Nini knew that the nurse was just trying to distract her from her dark thoughts, but she didn’t mind. She wanted to be distracted. 

“Kind of,” Nini said. “About a year and a half on and off, but we’ve been best friends since kindergarten. We’re juniors now.” 

“I thought something like that might be the case,” the nurse said, moving to check Ricky’s fluid and med bags. “You can always kind of tell when there’s a long history between people. It's almost a tangible thing when you're so comfortable around someone that they become an extension of yourself.” 

Nini smiled wistfully at Ricky, “He had a terrible lisp when we were kids. Almost no one could understand a word that he said, but I never had trouble, so in a way, I feel like he has always just been another part of me.” Nini began to tear up again. “I guess that’s why I’m so terrified. If I lose him, I’ll lose a part of myself too.” 

She was startled by Meg’s hand coming to rest gently on her shoulder, “Well, they do say that the only things worth having in life are things that you’re afraid to lose.”

“Do you think he’s gonna die?” Nini said. She couldn’t bear not asking any longer. 

“I’m just a nurse, and it’s not good to make predictions like that, but-” she hesitated, Nini looked up, her eyes pleaded for the nurse to continue. “If I had to guess, I’d say he’s gonna pull through. His fever was out of control this afternoon, but we got it held steady, and his last three readings have been steadily dropping, so I’d like to believe that he’s past the worst of it. Still, I can’t make any promises.”

Nini felt like she could _almost_ breathe again. “I know,” she sighed. “But thank you. I hope you’re right.” Nurse Meg moved to sign Ricky’s chart. 

“I’ve got to go check on my other patients, but I’ll be back in about an hour. Try to get some sleep,” she said kindly. Nini smiled softly back at her, nodding her head, and tried to settle back into sleep for a bit.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry if this made you sad. It made me sad too. And, not that anyone asked, but I tried to make Ricky sound kind of ooc in this cause it's not really him, it's Nini's worst nightmare version of him in his final moments... I don't know if that came across but if he seemed a little off to you, that was kind of intentional.


End file.
